Missing her comes in sunflowers, always reminding me of her sunny attitude and golden heart.
Forever missing you, Mom. I know you’d rather tell me to hush now and smile instead ’cause I got these sunflowers for free. 😀 (Oh, special thanks to UP Diliman’s garden along University Avenue for these lovely blooms). We had fun flower-picking! How I wish heaven had visiting hours, no? We’ll have tall stories to tell that’s for sure. ^_^
Anyway, when it comes to Mom, God knows that my tongue and brain sometimes lack the words to say and express how much I miss her. It’s really hard to put these mixed feelings into words. And so I’ll just leave this as it is.
I keep asking myself if he is the guy. If he is the right guy. And if he is the one. And if he is the man I will truly love. Will I?
Here’s the hard truth. I really don’t know. The inner Eve of me won’t even talk if I’m doing it right or if I’m just into believing that our love story on Skype is kismet. As ‘A’ (let’s just keep him by that name) would always say, “you’re always a scaredy cat.” Yes, I’ve always wanted to get a tattoo but here I am showing him pictures of tattoos I want. Just pictures ’cause I’m scared. But then again, I still want it. One day I will. Yeah right, Jess.
Omit the rest of the love story. There are too many to tell. 😀
Oh, then suddenly he wants to marry me. Holy Mother of Jesus. Is this guy serious??
“I’m going to fall in love with him. I’m going to be head over heels and my stomach is going to hurt every time he (walks into a room*) asks me to marry him goes online. I’m going to worry about him whenever he isn’t there, and there are going to be times where I’ll hate him. Because that’s what love is. It’s a kaleidoscope of emotions, all sorts of different colors blending together into one.” ~ C. M. Stunich / Losing Me, Finding You
Many were told that fate makes fun of us, that it gives us nothing but promises everything. When happiness seems to be within our reach, we reach out and find ourselves like fools. So…going back to A, he’s been deliberately upbeat with the marriage thing. Well after all, I’m still twenty-eight, free and single — for the moment. But will I ever have the courage to see him when the time comes?
Sometimes, you just can’t tell how you really feel.