Feelings of Being

To the one who’s reading this from Tx,

Hello from the other side ๐Ÿ™‚
I know you’re just there, checking on me, always listening to my feelings, reading me like an open book
I’m still coping, but don’t bother, I’m a mess these days. You know me well. ๐Ÿ˜„
Jesus will take the wheels, right? ๐Ÿ™‚

So how have you been?ย Please always take care of yourself
I know you struggle with your health and problems too
Hey you’re one of the toughest out there
You may not agree with me tough man but sure you are!

Don’t worry about me anyway
I assure you I will be okay in time
Like what you’ve said, grieving would take years, if not, a lifetime for some
It would take time.

I miss you though
So much
So much that once again you made me jot this down
It’s 0021 hours already and this blog is alive and loud

So tell me
Am I making sense here?
As if you would answer me ๐Ÿ˜„
Good night then.
I wish you well.

Until my next piece.

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My appreciation of you doesn’t need saying or any more writing.

I hope I brought colors into your soul as you also did in mine.

Take care always, my gentle grizzly.

‘invisible threads are the strongest ties’

An invisible thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but will never break.

About a Bear

spain osocreo que me he enamorado de un oso

i said the words a whisper

i want the world to know though

oh but he is just a bear

i was never good at poems

and I was never good at love

iโ€™m surprised Iโ€™m jotting one down

iโ€™m stoked my worldโ€™s spinning โ€˜round

about a bear I used to know

who cares for my long lost heart

who understands my highs and lows

who knows how to treat me right

i have a pretty name but Iโ€™m not so who cares

my name is Jessica and Iโ€™m in love with a bear

๐Ÿ™‚

I’m Sorry Mac-Mac

My New Year started with an emotional bang when my precious cat, Mac-Mac, died on the very first day. He was 9 years old.

I was completely heartbroken words just can’t describe it. To be honest, I still feel guilty for not being there for him when he started getting ill (again). I know how stressful it was for his immediate family (I can’t thank my friend Analyn enough for taking care of him) to attend to his illness because I saw the pictures of him trying to get up and wanting to walk out of the clinic already. He looked very curious…very curious why I was not around. It was heartbreaking. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

A part of me also died when I heard the news. What a news to welcome the new year. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ I hated myself that I wasn’t holding him when he died. It was the worst feeling not a damn thing can assuage the guilt and sadness inside me. I should’ve blogged about this last month, right?

No. Because I still couldn’t collect myself. I am so sorry my Mac-Mac. I love you so much. I can’t go on and type the words anymore.ย The fact that I was not with you is never going to change. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

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Thank you for the beautiful friendship, Mac. I know in this way I can give the love I failed to give during my MIA days when you needed me most. I hope this writing will heal my heart and I know you can hear me from the other side. Whew. I feel better now because of another realization. My emotions were selfish though. I should be thankful you died in the hands of my loving friends and for laying you down in a nice, warm environment and not in the clinic or in the streets of Kamias ’cause that’s not going to happen either.

Again, thank you Boss Mac for the wonderful 6 years. I will find comfort in remembering those memories with you. Always. ๐Ÿ™‚

Quantum Love

Quantum physics now pronounces A & J

The universe conspired that the photons and electrons interact

Such that one particle will affect the other

They will remain entangled.

In the case of A & J, Albert Einstein called it ‘Quantum Relationship’ or “spooky action at a distance.”

Time and space are immaterial. ๐Ÿ™‚Image

Dancel

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Dear Dan,

Thank you for the friendship. Thank you for the memories and belated Happy Birthday, my dear amigo. Akala mo nakalimutan na kita, hindi no! Ikaw pa Dan, malakas ka sa akin. Napanaginipan kita last week, sorry na. Promise babawi kami nina Karen sa’yo. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ

Hindi mo alam na kahit sa maikling panahon na pinagsamahan natin, isa ka rin palang mababaw ang kaligayahan katulad ko hahaha! Seryoso miss na miss na kita, dude. Salamat talaga, Dan. Salamat sa pag-aruga mo kay Mac-Mac, sa kalokohan sa office, sa on-time payroll hahaha, at higit sa lahat sa pag-alaga mo sa amin kahit may karamdaman ka. Sigurado ako okay ka na kasama Niya. Salamat sa lahat. Kitakits. :’)

Lagi,

Jess

 

“The greatest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude.” ~ Thornton Wilder ๐Ÿ™‚